Every now and then I think about how grateful I am to be "past my prime": If I was going to do anything genius and wonderful and amazing, I would have already done it. (Not that I can't do anything good after age 30, but academically and athletically, it's over. Brilliant people show their colors by the age of 25.)
I feel like a tremendous weight has been lifted from my shoulders. No longer do I have to wonder if I'm going to do something Great; I know I won't. And that's a great relief, let me tell you.
I'm not even bitter and trying not to be. I'm serious. I've been striving my whole life to be mediocre and normal. But I've been too "talented" to pull of mediocre. Now, however, I'm the typical suburban stay-at-home soccer mom writing about my mediocrity in a blog that only 5 people in the world read, which means I've finally found my averageness!
... For so long I felt like I was waiting around for this genius to surface. Like people were waiting for me to "make something of myself." I was supposed to cure cancer or feed the world's poor or become a professional or something like that. Do something Important, you know? It's nice to have that period of my life behind me. Makes me feel like I can breathe a little.
Incidentally, I do feel like I'm doing something important (so I don't need a pep talk). I chose something fulfilling and wonderful and even note-worthy. It's just mediocre. And I like that.
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